No, the patriarchy is not in an institution, although that would be appropriate. It is AN institution. Institutionalized means certain societal norms are in our unconscious, automatic ways of thinking and believing, directing and limiting our choices. Racism is one of the ways of seeing people that is institutionalized from our society, our families, and centuries-old beliefs. I only know, despite my evolution, studies, and will to change that I often act in ways that have been programmed into me, specifically by the patriarchy.
In the last entry I stated my current novel-in-progress is about the patriarchy, which is increasing my awareness of its presence in my thought process. It is also increasing my annoyance that I am not yet “over it.”
A prime example happened today. In the snow-piled and very icy parking lot, I backed out of my spot, only to hear a loud crunch. I immediately got out and said it was my fault. I really believed it was my fault. Until twenty minutes later at a red light, I was visualizing the accident, where the damage was done on both cars, and realized that he backed into me! It was not my fault. The other driver and I exchanged info, etc in a very civil and kind way. That was not the issue. The issue was my ridiculous automatic response that it was my fault.
When I was introduced into patriarchal studies and feminism in the nineties, I remember an article entitled “The Original Sin of Being Born Female.” Fortunately, in the current times of education and feminist revelations, most women would not relate to that article. Or would we?
My new novel, structured somewhat like Blood Draw, introduces two main stories, which will interweave with each other with a few sub-stories. Professor Vera Jones is teaching a college course entitled “The Ascent of the Patriarchy.” In another part of town, a guys’ club is meeting that used locker room humor to denigrate women.
When I began to write, initially I wrote the first chapter as the guys’ club meeting. I semi-consciously thought that men would find the book more inviting if I started with men. (institutionalized patriarchy) In reading it to my writers’ group, (five men and one women in addition to me), the comments were quiet but positive. In the following weeks of writing more chapters, I realized what I had done and why I did it. I moved the first class of the “Ascent of the Patriarchy” to be Chapter One. Two of the men in my writers’ group reported they would not be interested in reading the book if that were the first chapter they read. In addition, they did not understand the first chapter.
I really like my writers’ group and would not have written, revised or published Blood Draw without them. I respect their opinions. However, I did send the first charter to Wendy, my avid reader friend for another opinion. She read it, understood it, and responded did I really think five men would be interested in reading about the patriarchy?!? My Jungian friend, Cynthia, liked it as well and commented that reading about the patriarchy and its deeds will stir the men’s unconscious, resulting in an unnameable discomfort due to fears.
Fears of what? Many men have been wounded in the patriarchal society as well. And I certainly don’t mean the perpetrators of the women of #MeToo. Yet, they are in the ruling, the power class. Patriarchy: a system or society ruled by men. The opposite of patriarchy is not matriarchy, but egalitarian – a society with equal respect and value for women and men and children of all skin tones.
I like the story I am writing. I don’t like my natural tendency to please men in order to avoid conflict, to protect their ego and ultimately, my safety. I know I outwardly learned these behaviors in my generation. I have hope that the following generations will understand institutionalized patriarchy as a force to acknowledge and overcome.
Peace
Gabrielle
2/1/19